So this is the same song as Summertime, as far as I can tell. You’ve changed the name and I think a few sections, but the main issues with the original seem to carry over here of course. I think the main issue with the melody is the fact that the rhythm is just 3 16ths over and over for 8 bars with little to no variation on that throughout the song. It’s a little hard to explain, but it basically makes it feel run-on and therefore less catchy. I have been a victim of this myself, specifically with my song Maryland that falls into this same trap. Still great mixing and progression though so you retain the rating.
Upon relistening, I see you’ve added the thing where the pitch decreases. More importantly though, you’ve added another harmony. It’s subtle, but it’s definitely there, and it nearly completely fixes the issue. Combined with the new percussion that brings a lot of originality to the song, the listener now doesn’t have to focus on the melody the whole time, and they can enjoy the song more especially upon their second or third listen. You’ve earned another star in my books, for what they’re worth.